Seriously what is wrong with me. Old habits roughly the same weight now for 5 months, hovering up and down about 3 kg. ( 91 and 94). All I want to do is crack that magical number. See the scales go into the 80's and stay there.
I am still exercising 3 to 4 times a week, but problem is have increased my volume of food and eating the wrong stuff. Kids school snacks are my worst enemy.
So decided need a kick in the arse. Go back on Opti for a week (even if it's just to replace 2 meals a day and have normal dinner). Also to track my calorie intake. Make myself accountable for each morsel I put into my body.
Ok for example todays Diet:
Banana
Divine Macadamia Bar, chocolate coated
4 x Mini Chicken Kiev Balls
1/4 cup satay chicken and rice
1 pack Salt and vinegar chips (Snack size)
2 pack Doritos ( snack Size)
Cordial, 6 servings
Rush Chocolate Milk 500ml
Le Snack
Half can a bourbon
Oh and daughter had KFC snack box for lunch and I pinched some popcorn chicken and a couple of chips.
Ok, just added all that to "My Fitness Pal" app. 2,106 calories. If I wasn't exercising I would be gaining weight.
Knock off the chips and alcohol, cut back on the chicken balls and my day wouldn't have been to bad.
I find I have been eating way too many carbs again lately. Actually can eat a sandwich now. Not always does it stay down though.
Anyway some serious stuff will have to be happening soon or all this effort will be for nort.
Tuesday, 29 April 2014
Thursday, 20 March 2014
Addictions
Well definitely replaced my food addiction with a Clothing addiction. Can't go shopping in a mall now without coming home with a new outfit. Also loving the op shops now that I can fit into a fair amount of the clothes. Also been going pretty hard with the exercise routine lately and was thinking last night (while I was having trouble getting to sleep) that I think I have replaced sex with exercise. My ex and I where pretty active, nearly daily. Then to go to nothing, needed to realise that energy somewhere. Been to the gym 4 times this week and did a body balance class (thinking it was going to be easy was a big mistake). Was even going to go today to the gym, but morning started off crap with a bad nights sleep,so went shopping instead.
Ok now for the weight loss update...... Still on a very frustrating stall. It goes up and down about 3kg since January. I haven't been recording it as its been to fickle. It ranges from 90.9 to 93.9, but the most constant weight the scales say is 91.9kg. It just doesn't want me to see the 80's (sad face).
Ok now just did my measurements, no weight loss on the scales over a month, but all the exercise must be paying off. In one moth have lost another cm of waist and tummy. The big surprise is my wings are still even shrinking 1cm off my left arm and 2cm off my right arm. Boobs are the same (can't afford to loose any more there lol) another cm off my wrists and ankles. But the question mark is my thighs are up a cm.But I'm guessing that's the muscle. Or incorrect measurement last month. But glad I just did that as for when the scales aren't moving the body is still reshaping. Also the fact is I now haven't had a period for over 5 weeks so wondering how much extra fluid I'm retaining. No I'm not pregnant, already checked out that possibility and boy was I in a panic lol.
Still having some bad eating days and know I'm not eating enough fruit and veggies. But take my vitamins every day and have started to take a fibre vitamin now too, I feel it is working to a degree. My number 2's where all over the shop. But now they seem to be every second day and no bad constipation or diarrhoea (except after a night on the grog).
Go through bad chocolate days, they like come in waves.Might have a craving for a few days (in which I have been giving into) then can't stomach the stuff for about a week. I've switched over to diet cordial from normal cordial thinking that might be an issue (though I have had normal cordial all through my journey).
I've changed around my eating habits and times. But nothing wants to budge.
So I'm just going to stick with what I'm doing, though down the track I might do another pouch test and see if that shakes up my system at all.
Oh I posted this update on gastric sleeve site so thought I'd put it here too about loose skin:
Ok for those worried about excess skin. (Specially after watching the what goes wrong plastic surgery show on prime tonight) Specially after huge weight loss. My answer is EXERCISE while loosing. Going to put up my nearest to being nude lol and one taken a few weeks ago.
I have lost 86kg. I have 6kg more to go to my personal goal I am planning on a tummy tuck and thigh plastic surgery after I budge the last 6kg.
I am 44 for those wondering if age is a factor, I also have had 5 kids, twins in that equation.
This is to give you an idea of loose skin (but we are all different) but I do belief I'm not as bad as I could be because I have exercised for a fair bit of my journey. (20 months out)
First photo About June 2012
Second Photo February 2014
Oh also posted this on my Facebook wall and Gastric sleeve site: For the last 3 years. My friends and I have gone out to lunch on Labor Day. Thought I'd do a comparison shot.
Ok now for the weight loss update...... Still on a very frustrating stall. It goes up and down about 3kg since January. I haven't been recording it as its been to fickle. It ranges from 90.9 to 93.9, but the most constant weight the scales say is 91.9kg. It just doesn't want me to see the 80's (sad face).
Ok now just did my measurements, no weight loss on the scales over a month, but all the exercise must be paying off. In one moth have lost another cm of waist and tummy. The big surprise is my wings are still even shrinking 1cm off my left arm and 2cm off my right arm. Boobs are the same (can't afford to loose any more there lol) another cm off my wrists and ankles. But the question mark is my thighs are up a cm.But I'm guessing that's the muscle. Or incorrect measurement last month. But glad I just did that as for when the scales aren't moving the body is still reshaping. Also the fact is I now haven't had a period for over 5 weeks so wondering how much extra fluid I'm retaining. No I'm not pregnant, already checked out that possibility and boy was I in a panic lol.
Still having some bad eating days and know I'm not eating enough fruit and veggies. But take my vitamins every day and have started to take a fibre vitamin now too, I feel it is working to a degree. My number 2's where all over the shop. But now they seem to be every second day and no bad constipation or diarrhoea (except after a night on the grog).
Go through bad chocolate days, they like come in waves.Might have a craving for a few days (in which I have been giving into) then can't stomach the stuff for about a week. I've switched over to diet cordial from normal cordial thinking that might be an issue (though I have had normal cordial all through my journey).
I've changed around my eating habits and times. But nothing wants to budge.
So I'm just going to stick with what I'm doing, though down the track I might do another pouch test and see if that shakes up my system at all.
Oh I posted this update on gastric sleeve site so thought I'd put it here too about loose skin:
Ok for those worried about excess skin. (Specially after watching the what goes wrong plastic surgery show on prime tonight) Specially after huge weight loss. My answer is EXERCISE while loosing. Going to put up my nearest to being nude lol and one taken a few weeks ago.
I have lost 86kg. I have 6kg more to go to my personal goal I am planning on a tummy tuck and thigh plastic surgery after I budge the last 6kg.
I am 44 for those wondering if age is a factor, I also have had 5 kids, twins in that equation.
This is to give you an idea of loose skin (but we are all different) but I do belief I'm not as bad as I could be because I have exercised for a fair bit of my journey. (20 months out)
First photo About June 2012
Second Photo February 2014
Oh also posted this on my Facebook wall and Gastric sleeve site: For the last 3 years. My friends and I have gone out to lunch on Labor Day. Thought I'd do a comparison shot.
Ok always more things going through my crazy head. Want to actually sit down and type up my food and exercise for a whole week to check over what I'm doing wrong (pinching bits and pieces of food here and there doesn't help, specially when I think 'oh its only a tiny bit don't bother recording it' but it all adds up). Really need to budge this stall.
About to have a night on the grog isn't going to help lol. Oh well at least it's not going up. Better to maintain than slide back into a slow rise.
Wednesday, 12 March 2014
My first 2014 BLOG
Wow, I got lazy on this blog, just like I have been lazy this week with my food choices and exercise.
Ok update on weight. Got down to 91.9 on February 23rd 2014. Stalls are lasting way longer now. I weighed this morning at 93. So have had a gain grrrr. But refuse to enter it into my weight loss chart (it's a mind game thing with me and the app I am using to record my weight. Because if I defeat that I put on over a kg then I am back into obesity and not just overweight. Plus weigh in day is Friday!!!)
Thinking I should be recording my weight monthly now not weekly since it's now at a crawl. Another set back was when I rejoined the gym they recorded my height at 174cm. OMG I am finally shrinking, I know it happens with age but once again to change the height on my App will change my BMI. So just not winning at the moment.
Anyway, A lot has happened in my life lately. Had a big fight with my ex husbands family,then early in the new year I broke up with my partner of 1 year. That's when i broke my last stall, didn't really eat much for a week or 2. Now what's going on. well started to see someone, but it's not going crash hot at the moment. Really like him but doesn't even seem to have time to pick up a phone and text hello. So still officially single, but behaving.
Getting heaps of male attention which is a bit scary. Been going out more now I'm single and seem to get hit on 'a lot' . Sometimes I get angry about it as I think why didn't these men hit on me when I was big. But the realisation is I didn't like to look at me when I was huge, why would any man. In a few mind sets about that one.
Rejoined the YMCA and have done water aerobics and a body combat class. Even pushed myself to do 20 laps (1km) swim the other week. Plus been to the gym twice. Also done a few Core boxing classes, they are fun but exhausting. Been trying to keep my calories under 1200, but averaging about 1,500 to 1,700 a day. Yes seem to be able to fit way more in and making bad food choices.
So this is why I think I hunted down this blog to update, makes me accountable for my actions and choices.
Haven't exercised since last Friday and was feeling really guilty for it, but was feeling off colour and decided to go to the doctor's today. Have an ear and sinus infection. Explained a lot, dizzy, no balance or coordination, headaches, sleeping heaps and just feeling unwell. So took the edge off the no exercise guilt trip. Nothing can be excused for bad food choices though.
Oh had my appointment at the hospital to go on the Public waiting list for a tummy tuck. But been told its a LONGGGgggg wait. Might have to save the pennies still as the loose skin is very depressing.
Well will finish up with some updated photo's. If I don't Post I forget about it and it sits there for a couple of months. Going to try to keep it more up to date.
Same bikini top January 2012 to January 2014
Gym gear brought, ready to kick start me back into exercise. In a boxing stance lol January 2014
Ok update on weight. Got down to 91.9 on February 23rd 2014. Stalls are lasting way longer now. I weighed this morning at 93. So have had a gain grrrr. But refuse to enter it into my weight loss chart (it's a mind game thing with me and the app I am using to record my weight. Because if I defeat that I put on over a kg then I am back into obesity and not just overweight. Plus weigh in day is Friday!!!)
Thinking I should be recording my weight monthly now not weekly since it's now at a crawl. Another set back was when I rejoined the gym they recorded my height at 174cm. OMG I am finally shrinking, I know it happens with age but once again to change the height on my App will change my BMI. So just not winning at the moment.
Anyway, A lot has happened in my life lately. Had a big fight with my ex husbands family,then early in the new year I broke up with my partner of 1 year. That's when i broke my last stall, didn't really eat much for a week or 2. Now what's going on. well started to see someone, but it's not going crash hot at the moment. Really like him but doesn't even seem to have time to pick up a phone and text hello. So still officially single, but behaving.
Getting heaps of male attention which is a bit scary. Been going out more now I'm single and seem to get hit on 'a lot' . Sometimes I get angry about it as I think why didn't these men hit on me when I was big. But the realisation is I didn't like to look at me when I was huge, why would any man. In a few mind sets about that one.
Rejoined the YMCA and have done water aerobics and a body combat class. Even pushed myself to do 20 laps (1km) swim the other week. Plus been to the gym twice. Also done a few Core boxing classes, they are fun but exhausting. Been trying to keep my calories under 1200, but averaging about 1,500 to 1,700 a day. Yes seem to be able to fit way more in and making bad food choices.
So this is why I think I hunted down this blog to update, makes me accountable for my actions and choices.
Haven't exercised since last Friday and was feeling really guilty for it, but was feeling off colour and decided to go to the doctor's today. Have an ear and sinus infection. Explained a lot, dizzy, no balance or coordination, headaches, sleeping heaps and just feeling unwell. So took the edge off the no exercise guilt trip. Nothing can be excused for bad food choices though.
Oh had my appointment at the hospital to go on the Public waiting list for a tummy tuck. But been told its a LONGGGgggg wait. Might have to save the pennies still as the loose skin is very depressing.
Well will finish up with some updated photo's. If I don't Post I forget about it and it sits there for a couple of months. Going to try to keep it more up to date.
26th Nov 2013.
Wow, writing a second blog in the same month. Quick take my temperature. Well stall is still slowly moving. Down to 96.5. Only 4.5 kg till I am no longer obese. I would say I can taste it, but on a weight loss blog that doesn't sound appropriate lol
Been having a roller coaster of emotions lately. Something that I used to fix with food. Even though I still am trying to fix it with food, my body says "NO". I can still kinda pig out. Like today I have downed a chocolate bar and 2 small packs of cheezels, but now I am sitting here wondering if I am going to throw up......
My emotions are not really related to weight, more family, money and relationship issues. plus the fact I haven't been getting the best quality sleep lately. Been having anxiety attacks, had to catch a train the other day and nearly had a freak out.
Went to a wedding 2 weeks ago and brought myself a new dress.Size 16. Felt like a million dollars. Now I wish every formal occasion that was in the last 20 years can be reinacted so i can be a size 16 not a blob in all the photos.
Been having a roller coaster of emotions lately. Something that I used to fix with food. Even though I still am trying to fix it with food, my body says "NO". I can still kinda pig out. Like today I have downed a chocolate bar and 2 small packs of cheezels, but now I am sitting here wondering if I am going to throw up......
My emotions are not really related to weight, more family, money and relationship issues. plus the fact I haven't been getting the best quality sleep lately. Been having anxiety attacks, had to catch a train the other day and nearly had a freak out.
Went to a wedding 2 weeks ago and brought myself a new dress.Size 16. Felt like a million dollars. Now I wish every formal occasion that was in the last 20 years can be reinacted so i can be a size 16 not a blob in all the photos.
My sister gave me some clothes the other day.Size 14 skirt and 12 cardigan and they both fit. Also some size 16 jeans, that where too tight on her.
Saturday, 2 November 2013
UPDATE
Well it just took me a good 10 minutes to work out how to find my blog to update,has it been that long since I used it lol
Ok so where are we up too. Yes the seatbelt on the plane fit with room to spare. Sunbaked and swam on my holiday without a care. Still chubby but no longer a blob. Even went snorkelling and fit into a stinger suit. Not even there biggest size.
I now wear a size 16. Considering size 26 where getting too tight I am slightly proud of myself. Some of my clothes are still size 18 but that's just different makes and styles. Some times I go into a department store and find myself heading for the plus size and then realise they are all way to big. Even my shoe size has shrunk.
I go through hate myself moments when I look at myself naked and see the loose skin. But considering how much I have lost the skin isn't too bad.
Finally hit my goal of double digits, then hovered around it for way too long. Scales are finally moving downward again but really really slowly (throw in a few more really's there lol) But I haven't been the healthiest eater of late and been doing no exercise at all. So need to get off my arse and make this happen. My next goal is to no longer be obese, but 'just overweight' so 92kg is my next goal. Sitting on 98.5 at the moment. So 6.5kg
Here is a photo me in a size 16 on my holiday.
Ok so where are we up too. Yes the seatbelt on the plane fit with room to spare. Sunbaked and swam on my holiday without a care. Still chubby but no longer a blob. Even went snorkelling and fit into a stinger suit. Not even there biggest size.
I now wear a size 16. Considering size 26 where getting too tight I am slightly proud of myself. Some of my clothes are still size 18 but that's just different makes and styles. Some times I go into a department store and find myself heading for the plus size and then realise they are all way to big. Even my shoe size has shrunk.
I go through hate myself moments when I look at myself naked and see the loose skin. But considering how much I have lost the skin isn't too bad.
Finally hit my goal of double digits, then hovered around it for way too long. Scales are finally moving downward again but really really slowly (throw in a few more really's there lol) But I haven't been the healthiest eater of late and been doing no exercise at all. So need to get off my arse and make this happen. My next goal is to no longer be obese, but 'just overweight' so 92kg is my next goal. Sitting on 98.5 at the moment. So 6.5kg
Here is a photo me in a size 16 on my holiday.Friday, 30 August 2013
The scales vs. Jo
This stall is so frustrating. Like the scales are sticking it's tongue out at me every time singing 'neh neh' I go from 100.4 to 102 back and forward. Never reaching those double digits. Been sick all week, not eating much at all but nope, still not giving me that magical number. This stall is roughly on a month now. I know some people have longer stalls, but the frustration that the weight loss slowed down over the last few months and now just stopped. Plus I want too see those double digits soooooo baddddd.
Maybe I'm more sooky about it as I'm sick this week, considering how much mucus is being expelled from my body you would think....grrrr
I go on my cruise on my birthday. Fly up to Brisbane. One night in Brisbane then 7 nights on the Pacific Dawn P & O cruise. Up the coast of Queensland and back. Going with 5 friends. Was hoping to be lighter for it but since this stall has reared its ugliness not holding my breath. I'm curious to know if the air plane seatbelt will fit without an extension strap. It was one of my goals. We are flying with Tiger Airways and I have heard they have smaller seats. My dream was to get to 92kg by the cruise. But I cannot see 9 kg melting away in 21 days...sigh
Brought some material to make some sarongs. My body may have shrunk in size but when I strip off its all just hanging there. The worst will be to show of my thighs. All this loose skin. Makes me sick let alone anyone else that happens to glance at it. I hate it more than my stomach. People have stomachs, beer pots and loose skin from kids. But my thighs are hideous.
Been putting off buying bathers to see if I can get any more weight off. My old ones fit but a bit baggy. Might try to buy a new pair before I go but not much in the shops at the moment.
Well have my boys back this weekend and god forbid one of them knows where the kitchen sink is or the washing machine. So better get some mum duties done. Now selling Avon too, I let myself get roped into it. But been to crook to get around and give out books. Plan to drop some off this weekend.
Maybe I'm more sooky about it as I'm sick this week, considering how much mucus is being expelled from my body you would think....grrrr
I go on my cruise on my birthday. Fly up to Brisbane. One night in Brisbane then 7 nights on the Pacific Dawn P & O cruise. Up the coast of Queensland and back. Going with 5 friends. Was hoping to be lighter for it but since this stall has reared its ugliness not holding my breath. I'm curious to know if the air plane seatbelt will fit without an extension strap. It was one of my goals. We are flying with Tiger Airways and I have heard they have smaller seats. My dream was to get to 92kg by the cruise. But I cannot see 9 kg melting away in 21 days...sigh
Brought some material to make some sarongs. My body may have shrunk in size but when I strip off its all just hanging there. The worst will be to show of my thighs. All this loose skin. Makes me sick let alone anyone else that happens to glance at it. I hate it more than my stomach. People have stomachs, beer pots and loose skin from kids. But my thighs are hideous.
Been putting off buying bathers to see if I can get any more weight off. My old ones fit but a bit baggy. Might try to buy a new pair before I go but not much in the shops at the moment.
Well have my boys back this weekend and god forbid one of them knows where the kitchen sink is or the washing machine. So better get some mum duties done. Now selling Avon too, I let myself get roped into it. But been to crook to get around and give out books. Plan to drop some off this weekend.
Thursday, 22 August 2013
BAD HABITS
Well hello long lost blog. Long time no journal. I hit my one year mark since my sleeve just under 2 weeks ago. Total weight loss now stands at 76kg. I have lost my 'ultimate' goal weight. I say ultimate as I could never see myself ever being that weight. But as I get closer my dream is slowly turning into a reality.
I am only 3 kg off my original goal. To be the weight I got down too just before my wedding back in 1990. But I keep sabotaging myself with old bad habits and have currently been stuck at the weight I am for weeks now. In over a month I have only lost just under 2 kg. Bit of a change from the 1 to 1.5 kg falling off each week. Where am I going wrong! let me tell you.
Ok just today I had 10 squares of Chocolate, a chocolate milk, some dip, cheese, kabana and crackers, 2 small packs of twisties and a bowl of icecream with chocolate ice magic...... The only thing healthy I ate was a banana for breakfast. I have been trying to psychoanalysis my behaviour. Other than I have a really bad head cold and my kids are making me upset and sad I have no excuses.
The surgeon always said I would never be skinny though I have surpassed his original goal for me by 10kg. I forget this surgery is a tool and not the full answer. Ok fair enough I can't pig out like I used too. I mean before surgery the scoop of icecream would have been about 3 or 4 and half a bottle of the chocolate topping. The 10 squares of chocolate would have been the whole block and the 2 x 27 gram packets of twisties would have been a 150 gram bag. But all that sugar and useless calories :( Decided to just add up the calories for the day. 1,427. That's nearly 500 more than I should be consuming.
Haven't been doing any exercise either. Also been back to smoking nearly a packet a day. Ok I need a good reality check slap.
I am hoping that renewing this journal helps me become accountable. Even though I don't think anyone actually reads it that putting my thoughts and feelings, plus addressing my bad habits that I will wake up and renew where I am on this journey. I want to loose a minimum of 10 more kg by summer.
Anyway I am now looking into plastic surgery being so big for so long has taken a massive toll on my body to areas that should have never been allowed to stretch. I am now in a size 16 to 18. But have loose skin on my arms, thighs, neck, bum and overhang on my tummy. I am once again on the public waiting list for a tummy tuck. My appointment is in November. But that will only be my tummy. Been considering going over to Thailand to one of these plastic surgery holidays. Getting the works done.
Think I'm just a bit down as I'm sick at the moment and had a very roller coaster last few months.
Would you belief after loosing all this weight I actually sometimes feel fatter and hate my body more than I did than I was at my biggest. I have to look at my before and after photos I have created to put some prospective to it all.
I no longer have to shop in larger woman's
clothing sections or stores. My feet have shrunk to fit back into normal shoes. I can now buy nicer bra's and undies not granny stuff. I can walk around without huffing and puffing. Get up and dance with my friends. Wear heels again.
I really must keep reminding myself of where I have come from to I can refocus on where I am going.
Here are some progress photos. Just put them up for myself for that extra slap in the face.
Bottom photo was At my biggest in July 2012 and my 12 month sleeve anniversary photo shoot taken about 12th August 2013.
Oh found this draft for May, thought I'd just tag it on as not surehow to put in place with dates etc.
MAY 2013
Now for my weight lose, it's now starting to slow down quite a bit, I'm not sure if it's because of bad eating habits. Not over eating, but just the wrong things. Or if it's because I have started drinking a bit more. Or I did start exercising a fair bit so could have been building muscle. Or could just be a plateau that I have hit at 7 - 8 months.
Still 16kg off my original goal, but want to get lower than that now. want to try to get at least 10 more kilo's off when I hit my first goal
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